Two Truths & A Lie

Who hasn’t played a good ice breaker?

I know we all remember those college dorm days full of Never Have I Ever which led to a disastrous drinking game. But on the less damaging side, I’m thinking more like Two Truths & a Lie.

Twitter is a great social networking tool that I’m not sure many of us truly use to it’s potential. I’ve been known to look to my followers to play fun games online, so I decided to play Two Truths & a Lie via Twitter to see just how well I know my followers. Please, see the fun below!

This is getting good! Follow me @JGRunsTheCity to play more two truths & a lie! Also, This post is loosely related to the Athenos Two Truths and a Lie Party in Atlanta, where their giving away lots of cool stuff, including a free trip to South Beach!  I’m going, so if you’re local and thinking about attending, let me know or RSVP to attend at the Athenos Facebook Page under the Events Tab!

JG*

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I'm a star how could I not shine?

“….and I wonder if you know, what it means…to find your dreams.”

Man I do. 2009 was crazy but it was so good. I really got my mind right last year. This year, I was motivated and I created a vision board as a physical reminder as to why 2010 is going to be great and why waking up every day is such a blessing. I got the support of some of my e-sisters and we all decided that we would create our boards and have them complete by tomorrow. I’ll share with you guys their boards when they are all complete, but for now here is mine.

Click here for close ups on each section.

Here’s the explanation of my vision:

  • I read online somewhere that when creating a vision board that is focused on the well being of one’s life, you should put a picture of yourself in the center. A picture that shows you smiling and happy. I think this picture captures that perfectly. Affirmations.
  • My three main focuses for this year and life in general are God, Growth, and Gains.
  • GOD
    • I kept this section small because there is no room for flexibility and compromise. I give my life completely unrestrained to God.
    • I have to recognize the power of a praying woman. I’ve seen how powerful God can be when you call upon him.
    • I must not forget how awesome God is that he gives me 90% while only asking for 10% in return. Even in hard times, God asks for less than a server does at any restaurant.
  • GAINS
    • Money is always on everyone’s mind, but I will stop letting it control me. I control it.
    • I will secure scholarships for my MBA program this year. Each school awards money, but I’m looking for full rides and supplemental scholarships. Little to no DEBT!
    • My credit score has been on the mend since 2009 and I’m really pleased with where I’m at. I will reach and exceed 750 by the end of this year.
    • The “Protect your assets” clip is funny. I need to continue to build and collect my assets, as well as keep my booty in shape. 🙂 Indeed.
    • The $1,000,000 bill is powerful for me. In my business endeavors this year I will be fruitful. Whether it’s money in my bank, or money for a worthy cause, I’ll be collecting them Obamas.
    • Basically this year, I will really latch on to my long-term wealth building strategy. ROTH’s and other investments. I’m grown now, time to act like it.
  • GROWTH
    • This section ended up being the largest because it just encompasses so much.
    • Business Schools. I know where I want to go, I know where my heart is, I don’t know where the money is. LOL Either way, all of these schools will be FTW.
    • The “Princess Diaries” is a shout out to remind myself to keep writing. Keep blogging. Keep inspiring. Keep Learning.
    • Some symbols like the Ailey dancer, the ΔΣΘ, the bag full of pearls and money, my avatar in a sexy bikini, and the random references to looking fly are just affirmations to keep up with my passions. Health, Fitness, Shopping, and the Greatest Sorority ever.
    • The section concerning my love life makes me smile. There really isn’t much to say except I understand now more than before how real relationships work. It has a lot to do with more than just Love. I have the “Fire & Ice” symbols there to represent the balance that is needed (as well as… he and I’s connection). The Obamas are proof that two people can work together even with the world watching. Will & Jada are proof that love is about being open, honest, and communicating. The picture of he and I is proof that black love is still alive and well, and two highly driven individuals can find each other and find happiness. My putting his professional business on my board represents how I value his success and I make it a priority for me as well.
  • There are several random little shout outs on the board that I am affirming. Live life! Drink and be merry! Travel! I wish to leave a strong legacy. That doesn’t happen overnight so the building starts now. I want to help heal the world! When I die they will say “Nothing like her ever was.

That’s about it. It was sooo powerful for me to make this. I almost cried when I made the picture of FLOTUS and myself side by side. Someone commented on FB “You do resemble her, except you won’t be the President’s wife, you’ll be the President!” *sigh* I love the faith the world has in me. I won’t let you down. 🙂

JG*

P.S. I recommend that everyone do this. Seriously.  Check out SkinnyBlackGirl’s Vision Board. The rest will be up soon!

It's 2010 and…

…I’m loving it!

2010

Here’s the hitch though:

I need a break from blogging. I’ve pretty much been blogging for a year straight. I posted almost 200 articles last year. I got really burned out from it because I felt like I started it for fun, but then I got caught up putting pressure on myself to respond to certain things. Those who know me know that I’m always on “the Koolaid” and I’m always happy. It just burns my britches to see bitterness, petty behavior, and snide gossip all the time. Being a blogger, you often feel the need to pick up on the latest story and give your spin, and so forth and so on. It was tough on me being constantly faced with all the drama of the world. Oh I’m still faced with it, and I’m still fighting it, I just need to not put pressure on myself to constantly respond to it.

Another thing is as I inch closer to starting my MBA this fall there is a lot to get in order. I was already struggling with finding the right time to write my blogs, that’s only going to get worse, so I need to set some time apart to put together my Vision Board, and really restructure my life so that in the upcoming months I’m not stressing out as I get prepared to leave the working world and become a student again. Once I do that I can schedule time to write as well as a schedule of consistent posting. Again with the timing, my involvement in my community will continue to increase as I continue to mentor “My Kids” and I become more involved with the plight of the homeless via The Samaritan House of Atlanta. When I make my move for school, I’ll be needing all of y’all to recommend to me some great programs to get involved in. So stay up!

I’m not quitting blogging, I’m just going to move this site to a free one, and use it for more personal rants, and then post my really good and deep topics on TheFreshXpress.com and Single Sisters Speak Out. So all the content will be moved and I’ll still be writing. It’s just my more personal thoughts will be reserved for those that truly care and can relate. I have amazing stuff going on in my life right now (apparently I managed to escape the plague of Black Woman Single Syndrome the media is hyping up beyond swing flu) and I should be able to share that with close friends and efriends alike. Just make sure you’re subscribed to TheFreshXpress.com and stay linked to this blog so that you’ll get more information on where it’s moving and when. In the meantime, please get connected to me so you can catch my Twitter #rants that could also be turned into a blog one day. 🙂 Also, add me on Facebook as a friend but let me know where you are coming from so I don’t ignore you into the abyss. 🙂

It’s not over. I promise.

Thank you so much for supporting me. You guys give me life!

JG*

P.S. I know I’m not done blogging, not even a little bit. I love sharing life’s experiences and lessons. I said I’d start on my book this year, and it’s coming. I feel like I can do that now and I have the focus, the direction, and the confidence. But as I begin the path of a Black MBA student this year, prepare to see my ewriting pick up. 🙂

Busy Week

Hey Guys… busy week before the holidays, but I promise I have blogs in the pike. I really do! LOL They are just all half-written, and I’ve been so swamped I haven’t been able to finish them. Throughout the holidays I’ll post them, but sorry, I’ve just been so lazy! Next year OFR will be back in full force. Hang on! 🙂

What exactly is a "Good Black Man"?

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I know that question seems kind of dumb, and everyone will have a different definition replacing some key elements here and there, but seriously, let’s talk about this. These days as women, particularly black women, are fretting about being independent and yet still single you often hear the phrase “I’m out here looking for a good black man.” This is saying that there’s a pool of black men out there, some are good, but most are bad, therefore this search is often difficult.

I don’t like that.

I especially don’t like that because often times I believe the criteria for “good” is lacking in real substance. I hear these women out there talking about having STANDARDS, and I agree wholeheartedly that one should have them. Hell, I have a pretty strict set of standards as well. My only issue is that half the time these standards have very little to do with what I believe make a relationship thrive. A pretty common concept for black women is having a man that has what they have i.e. a degree, corporate/impressive job, etc. However, nowhere in the rule books does it say that a degree guarantees that he will love you, nowhere in the rule books does it say that his job will keep him from slapping you across the room. The only thing the rule books say in that regard is that crappy people are crappy people regardless of what they have in life. Truth be told, and it pains me to say this, but “having what you have” is going to be harder and harder to find as the gap in education gets wider. That doesn’t necessarily mean the gap in good men is getting wider. Hell I know several people who have degrees and have no job, does that automatically stack them in the evil, undateable, unworthy pile? Not to me at least.

So please, can someone explain to me what this mysterious Good Black Man is all about? People talk about him as if he is a Centaur (no Iota…JOKES!), or a unicorn, or the lochness monster. People swear that the only ones that exist are snatched up by white women, or men with Prada shoes. This makes me laugh because I look around my circle of friends and I see PLENTY of Great Black Men. We’re in our twenties so many of them don’t have that first million in the bank. Chances are many of them never will only because that’s just the way the cookie crumbles. Sure we all want to be millionaires but the world aint big enough for all of us. But these men are great. Perfect? Of course not. However they have vision, goals, plans, put in hard work for the people they love, and they are just generally great to be around. Yet and still, while being their friend I’ve seen many a woman abuse what they had to offer, or leave them high and dry for that “greener grass” that amounted to nothing more than a financial upgrade.

Now I’m painting with a broad brush here but it seems that when women are looking for a “Good Black Man” what they are really wanting to see is his resume, not his character. Good School? Check. Good Job? Check. Own Property? Check. Check Check Check. Meanwhile overlooking the fact that he aint about a dang thing. I’m not saying these things aren’t great, but they can’t be the sole factors we consider. I’ve seen people fall for the above things without even considering the rest.

Sure I understand that you want security, but what if a man could provide that without a degree? Or without the pretty job? Would those things still matter? For the super-duper independent woman that laments how much she’s got her own and she doesn’t care what he’s talking, does it matter to you his pedigree? Since you have all that you could desire minus the man, it would seem to me that all you would be looking for is a man of the highest quality character regardless of what he owns. Yet and still, sometimes it’s these highly paid, highly successful, Benz driving women, that are out there boo-hooing because they can’t find a man that’s more successful, more paid, and driving a Benz and a Rover since that’s what they deserve for amassing their riches. It’s funny because you will see a million dollar man with a five dollar woman. This always shocks and astonishes women. “Why is he with her?”…. maybe because he likes her for more than her bank account or her accolades.

I’m just going to be honest with you. I’ve never concerned myself with these things, and I think it’s paid off. One of the men I dated in the past had little to nothing in terms of networth. Had a degree, but barely had a job, didn’t have a flashy car, or a swanky spot, but I completely only saw him. While he and I didn’t work out, I can fast forward to now and see that he’s very successful, and doing quite well for himself. He just needed time. When it comes to relationships, I’ve always been pretty lucky to find someone that if the bottom fell out, we would be okay. Clearly they didn’t always work out, but the material stuff was never an issue yet we were always okay. I can say my current Gentleman Situation is the same. Should the flashing lights disappear we would still be kickin. To me that’s what’s most important. Remember things can be here today, gone tomorrow. So when defining that “Good Black Man” look a little bit deeper. Also, chances are you walk past him every single day, put a smile on your face, maybe he’ll stop. Open your eyes a little bit, and maybe he’ll stay.

New Year's No-No's

new_years

Greetings everyone! As the New Year finds everyone in hopefully good health and high spirits there are several things that come with it. Everyone wants to start over as if the actual changing of the years erases prior ills and fails. Well I understand the mentality behind needing a definite point in time to get your life together, but let’s be a little honest with ourselves. If there are some changes you need to make in your life, and you know about them well enough in advance to plan on making them at some defined point in the future, you are doing yourself a disservice. Just go ahead and do what you need to do, and feel better faster.

I digress.

I decided to make a nice little list of things that I would be most happy if the masses could avoid doing publicly as the ball drops this year. I think it’s a step toward freedom for all mankind. It seems that as social networking picks up more speed and people live vicariously through their lives online, we are becoming more and more privy to thoughts that I’m sure we could all go without. So in an attempt to pump the breaks on senseless status updates and driving people up the wall, here’s a little list to hopefully guide your sharing this holiday season.

  1. Everyone adds people here and there on FB that perhaps we don’t like, don’t know, or grow to hate. It’s not necessary to announce on FB that you will be deleting people in 2010. This makes no sense. Do you expect people to stop and analyze their FB interactions with you to determine if they are on the chopping block? Ok…and then what? Do I now have 16 days to plead my case? LOL It’s not that serious. Just delete and move on.
  2. Same with Twitter, don’t need to hear that you are unfollowing people because you just don’t have room in your life for the nonsense. That in itself is nonsense and you should start moving more life furniture starting with *points finger* YOU.
  3. Unless you are speaking on your winterboo updates, no one needs to hear you lament about how you will end your single streak in 2010. Unless of course you are being totally honest about the things that make YOU an undateable person, and you are planning to change those things, 2010 will probably look like 2009, 2008, etc. So please, just go back to updating about what you had for lunch.
  4. We all have plans to lose weight every time the New Year rolls along. However, don’t flood the gym without knowing what you’re doing. These times the gym is super packed and everyone needs to be on point. Don’t be lazy and hog the ab machine. Also, don’t front like you’re trying, but in reality you just stand behind the treadmill machines stretching for an hour. FB Photos will tell your secret in 4 months.
  5. Success is an ongoing measure to reach for. Don’t start talking about how you are going to take a break and then get back in grind mode come 2010. As someone who loves a good accountability partner, and can be one for you if you like, I’m just going to slap you upside the head. Success never sleeps, so neither should you. Telling me that you’re going to chill, but you have big plans in 2010 tells me you aren’t hungry, and I like to eat, so get out of my way. 🙂

New Year’s Resolutions are for you and no one else. I’m all about the power of affirmations and I share my more broad affirmations that can be used by all, but we don’t need to hear/read your entire list of ways you are going to get your life together. Chances are you won’t finish the whole list, and then how will you feel knowing, that I know, that you know, and well…. you know.

That’s about it for now, I feel like this post comes off a bit more Crabby Sally than I intended, but it’s Monday, it’s early, and vacation starts on Friday. Do you have any other New Years No-No’s that you would like to add to the list? I considered doing a rants on the big Facebook F’ups I see on the daily, but that’s another post all together. Join in the fun!

🙂

To My Readers:

I’m not going to lie, I started blogging a year ago on Rants of a Wild Child, now I have my own site, and I contribute to a few others and it’s DRAINING. To be honest the reason it’s so draining on me is because I have something to say about EVERYTHING and I’m still struggling to figure out how to say it succinctly.  You guys are awesome because you stick around for it all! Well this week I had so much to say that it was emotionally draining for me to even get up the energy to write about it, and then edit it down to a reasonable length. I just ended up abandoning a lot of thoughts. For the time being. I’m not taking a break, but this week just got the best of me. Not to mention as we end out the year, the day job is getting more and more demanding. Fear not, next week I’ll be back to go over some of the things that plagued my mind this week, and some new stuff. I just wanted to kee you guys abreast of OFR, and make sure you knew not to delete the bookmark! LOL Stick with me!

JG*