Sexy Spec is back at it!!

*****BREAKING NEWS!!!

HIDE YOUR

DAUGHTERS AND

QUESTIONING SONS!!****

Sexy SPECTACULAR (his birth name) is back and he’s letting all of us haters know that THIS IS NOT A GAME SON!

In his newest video he addresses all concerns that stemmed from the first video. He lets all the men know that if they watched it, THEY are gay, and to the ladies who didn’t like his mother’s panties, he’s got something for us too. He’s back with the black boxer briefs! The word SMEDIUM doesn’t even begin to describe it.

Again, I ask, WHO THE HELL IS LINGERIE AND WHY IS THAT HIS NAME? Why?! Is that the name you picked out of the hat? Come on Pretty Ricky.

Then I ponder, WHO IS TAPING THIS BAFOONERY!? The first video was clearly a self-made attempt, but this!? I bet it was Lingerie. Or maybe Edible Panties, or Ben-Wa Balls, or some other unfortunately named member of Pretty Ricky.

Where to start!? Staring at the camera while flexing your Man-tits truly made my heart hurt for the “man” who was taping this, and for the tattoo artist that had to ink you.

So basically you slid around and humped the freaking floor in your church socks and boxer briefs. You made hard, intense love to that chair. I mean you really made that chair your bitch. I am SCARED of you boo! From now on I will watch my alcohol intake at the club because Lord KNOWS what will happen to me if I get tipsy and some high yellow freak wants to prove that he’s not Gay (just DL). I’d hate to see you at a family reunion. All those folding chairs for you to molest. SOMEONE! THINK ABOUT THE CHAIRS!

But to add insult to injury,

HOW YOU JUST GOING TO DO AN ENTIRE STRIKERS ROUTINE AND NOT GIVE CREDIT!? I mean at least they have an audience and some sort of sexiness to themselves. And what was with the random gymnastics you were doing? Who wants all that in the bedroom? By the time you are done flipping around I’d be done left $6.37 on the table, the number to a psychologist, and be halfway home. You are the kind of guy I’d take out for a seafood dinner and never call again. Where are you filming this crap? Does your mother know that you move her pillar and plants out of the hallway to do your Nasty McNastiness? I sure hope you clean up the scuff marks.

S.M.H.!

I allowed my eyes to bleed until the entire video was done and how can this guy call anyone a B**** A** N**** after what he just finished doing while Keith Sweat’s “Nobody” is playing in the background. GTFOH!!!!

Spectacular, one doesn’t have to watch this to know that it is unsuitable for humanity. I took that L for the team and now I am spreading the good word.

And Now I Blame:

  • @TORIANBEAN14 on Twitter for incensing this fool. LOL
  • Wood Flooring
  • Folding Chairs
  • The sense of sight
  • Mr. Rogers
  • Tila Tequila

What is wrong with society?

Let me get a list of things off my chest that have pretty much given this week a big gigantic question mark.

So earlier this week we were faced with the downside of being “Tipsy” in the club and that was a mess all in itself. I mean I can’t say enough about that disaster of a career move. Sexy Spectacular later went on Radio shows to back up his video and called all the men who watched it gay. I’m pretty sure Mr. Spectacular, that most men did not have to watch it to understand the gaydom behind it. Not to mention, if they were gay, having a bunch of gay men watching you grind doesn’t particularly help your case. Now it wasn’t gay because he was grinding in his mother’s panties. It was gay because he pleaded with other men to send him videos of themselves doing the same. Gay indeed. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

But there is plenty wrong with what he turned around and did in that poor lonely hallway.

Well it seems as though the whole incident didn’t really go the way that Sexy Spec had hoped it would. He was blasted and scorned all over the internet (1/4 Random didn’t miss the chance either) and Twitter got the best of him.

In response to a twitterling calling him a Gay Fish he replied:

picture-41

I mean whatever dude. You didn’t lose a single MySpace or BlackPlanet fan I’m sure.

Moving on:

So it seems that Octo-mom isn’t the only one out to make the US a Superpower again using the art of reproduction. Desmond Hatchett truly takes the cake!

desmond-hatchett

Oh Bless his soul! This man is 29 years old and has 21 children. That we know of. Get OUT of here! He was on the court docket 11 times in one day for 15 of his children. His women get a little under $2 a month from him in Child Support after it’s been garnished and divided up. He claims he’s done and that he really didn’t want all of those children, “It Just Happened.” Understatement of the freakin’ year. He had a point though about the ladies that he’s impregnanting with his Post-Armaggedon Army. They know what they are getting into. It’s a bit hard for this guy to hide the 20 other children he has. Not to mention that among the 11 Mothers, some of them had to be repeat offenders. So to those women I have to say “You can’t be mad!” That and, “Have you ever heard of birth control? Condoms? Staying away from dudes who can get you pregnant just by sitting on the bus next to them?” I seriously just don’t get it.

I was having a conversation with a friend and he said he was wondering if he was becoming a hot commodity because he was a college educated man with no children. I told him that I don’t know about the hot commodity thing, and not to mention that everyone I know in our age group with children are all college educated. However, I did have to agree that more and more of the people I meet (men and women) have children. Now 25+ and beyond years ago, this was not a big deal. Clearly it still isn’t, however, I think it startles people because so many of our peers have children yet aren’t married and aren’t planning to be any time soon. He was asking if he should settle his mind on the possibility that no matter how hard the tries he’s going to end up “stepdaddy”. I honestly did not have an answer. It seems highly possible especially when you see guys like this dude who are hell bent on starting their own rainbow coalition.

Either way, next question mark of the week:

r430441313

Kayne West.. the guy who he himself has said that he doesn’t do books, is writing a book. From the sound of it, it will big a thing with pages, pretty pictures, and huge letters strung together to make words and maybe a sentence or two. Almost like a children’s book. The title? “Thank You And You’re Welcome” Yes.. that’s right. Thank you for buying this piece of crap and eating up everything I do, even down to my shag-fro and friend with the leopard tights, and your welcome that I am so awesome that I can get away with it.

From his own mouth:

“This is a collection of thoughts and theories” and I’m paraphrasing right now, “I get paraphrased and misquoted all the time.”

He also has said the following about books:

“Sometimes people write novels and they just be so wordy and so self-absorbed,” West said. “I am not a fan of books. I would never want a book’s autograph.”

I mean, imagine that! Someone writes a novel… and it has WORDS! Also, “so self-absorbed”? Pot… please meet Kettle. Kiss it, hug it, and love it. Books are clearly trash because Kanye West does not deem them awesome enough to desire their autographs (because asking the author for an autograph and admiring their work and creativity is only reserved for people like Kanye) Only things that one would pay good money for are important. Wait.. I hear books can be quite expensive! What’s that? Oh…. not if you get them on Amazon? Oh yes… Right. I wonder how much a K. Yeezy autograph is going these days. I’d pay BIG money for his book if he signed it “Gay Fish.”

I have to also end my Kanye rants with, “I Love Kanye. I really do. But he’s a hot ass mess, and my support of him is practially gone.” It’s true people.

I…. think that’s all for this week. It’s Thursday and has been a short work week, so I may have a whole new list of “WTH” moments by tomorrow.

SMH!

Can I please blame it on the Alcohol?

During the weekend of the year set aside to remember our Soldiers, the internet came ablaze with the newest piece of complete F***ery. Probably the biggest I’ve seen this year. According to the title of the video.. a young gentleman of an irrelevant man band named Sexy Spec put out a video and issued a challenge. Before I get into it, let me just show it to you all.

The song is called Tipsy. It’s pretty bad, and it makes me wish I were drunk.

Ok… Seriously. Who really, I mean REALLY cares about Pretty Ricky? When this first started, I was hit with simple confusion. Who is this guy? What are the words that are coming out of his mouth? What is IN his mouth? I’m familiar with Pretty Ricky, being a FL girl and all, but I never got close enough to learn names, faces, or pretty much anything about them.

My heart started to beat faster.

This young gentleman is issuing a CHALLENGE to more widely known and appreciated R&B artists on the art/act of GRINDING. Yes! This guy would like to have a friendly competition on who can gyrate and grind their pelvises, while wearing panties, the best. There was no pause, and no *no homo*. While I do not condone the usage of those words, I have come to accept them as the straight man’s way of excusing his questionable behavior.

This guy wants to know who is the best. Not his sister, his mother, or the mother of his children that I’m sure he has with all that thrusting. HE wants to know. And in an attempt to show you he’s serious, he backs it up in his mother’s bathroom hallway or something in his RED GRANNY PANTIES (that’s what they are. Accept it.) and begins to convulse. I’m sure his smedium self thought he was really doing something, but what my bleeding eyes saw looked more like a seizure in slow motion.

Then as if that wasn’t enough the lyrics to this song make me sad for the young impressionable girls that clearly fall for this delusion of grandeur.

“All white linen and gucci loafers” ….. Doesn’t count dude when your loafers came in a box. Check to make sure Gucci even makes those before you take pictures in the club in them. Can totally tell where these guys are from. 🙂

“She said she cum 100 times looking at my poster” What? Who does this? POINT.THEM.OUT!

And then the rap piece at the end in which dude goes on a strange rant about B*tch A** and Hoe A** N*ggas and so forth and so on, really kind of ruins the already disgustingly nauseating mood. I honestly had to stop watching the video because I didn’t have any paper bags to breathe into to prevent me from passing out. I had it playing in the background and when dude started flipping out I was like WTHoly Hamhocks and Waffles Batman?

Everyone, please. Hide your young teenage daughters who are hoeing themselves on MySpace and probably salivating at this strange display of the Man-V.

I would really have to be DRUNK to think that this was hot/sexy/erotic/not gay, so Tipsy really wouldn’t do it. Blame it on the alcohol INDEED.

Here are some other things to blame for this complete clusterf*** of shame

  • Al Gore for inventing the internet
  • The FAMU Strikers for popularizing the freaking thrust
  • Miami for inventing “riding out”
  • The Color Red
  • Sarah Palin for failing to provide a perfect example of family values
  • The country of Taiwan
  • Martin for the episode about his reunion when he said “Pretty Rick what dey call me”
  • Polar Bears